Glorious Esperance
Luke Winter, host of the morning show on Radio West invited us into the studio and as we waited for our spot (us media types have 'spots', not appearances, they are for the GP- general public) we were made aware of the pranking that was going on, the April Fools Day Grand Fooling. Luke was spreading the story going round that ACDC were coming to town, for one night only, only for a night, and that tickets were available from Ross Beckett at the Civic Centre, and to get on down there if you want to see the worlds greatest rock band performing in Esperance Civic Centre Music Hall.
Our 4X4 tracks on Cape le Grande beach
Many went, and when they found out it was an April Fool’s hoax a few found the joke in it, some were irate and didn't see the funny side at all, and we were on air just after Luke came clean, presumably our story was drowned out by swearing and cursing and slippers hurled at radios. How can the appearance of three idiots dressed in binbags and budgie smugglers compete with the rock-it-to-the-core get-on-down of ACDC?
We stop to admire the beautiful views
We also that day went to see Paul at Esperance Glass and he agreed to fix the window that was smashed by those drunken youths, which since Perth has been patched with cardboard, sticky-tape and a plastic bag flapping in the gap to give a raggle-taggle gypsy style to the van. He was amused by our story and so agreed to help out, just bring the van in early next morning and jobsagoodun bigfella.
We went into town and popped in to see Stuart Ward, at Bay Automotive, the Holden dealership in town, who we met the night before, and he introduced us to Bruce Kelman, his partner in the business. Between these two we were subsequently to find ourselves better looked after than Queen Elizabeth's prize corgis, if those corgis be pampered then plied with more alcohol than a herd of prize rhinoceroses could manage. More on that to come though.
Look at the angle this 4X4 is riding down a rock on! We were 'holdin on tight to the Jesus bars'.
Not only were we extremely looked after in terms of work to earn money for Book Aid but we were given the star treatment in private tours of the area. Barry Wroth, another Apexian and Laurie, our home host and resident policeman were our guides for the day. In Esperance there are two kinds of people; those with a 4x4 diesel powered truck, and those who want one. And as we thundered along the sand, riding the curve of coastline from Esperance Bay towards Cape La Grande and Frenchman's Peak I wanted to hurl Barry out of his seat and into the dunes aim seaward to take this badboy into Ultimate Off-Road Territory and tear up the motherlovin seafloor. Returning to sanity as my head bounced off the roof of the car, I mentally apologised to Barry as we rebounded over yet another compacted-solid drift of sand ("oops, didn't see that one coming", said Barry, repeatedly, again and again).
Laury runs into the cool clear waters at Cape le Grande
View from the top of the rock we climbed in the 4X4s
Slowing only momentarily along the 24 kilometre stretch to observe some Brumbies (wild horses) we wasted no time in getting to Cape La Grande. But this sighting of two brumbies and their foal was, we later learned, an extremelyspecial event. For the past four year Laury, an equestrian finatic, has been hoping to sight them. We were extremely lucky to see such magnificent wild animals galloping along the beach.
Brumbies grazing in the sand dunes, Cape le Grande
The walk down was a swift one, and we careered from Cape la Grande towards Esperance Bay, along the sand again with as much head banging, jolting bounce as we had on the way ("oops, didn't even see that one coming", said Barry) and back to Laurie's, for a barbeque, some beers, and then more beers once Bruce turned up.
Later in the week, at Stuart's behest and Bruce's insistence we joined them for dinner at the Loose Goose Restaurant, then after the meal (Phil cut loosy-goosy and enjoyed the local favourite of a Lamb's Brain starter followed by a Pigs Nipples main course) we went to Sin City Niteclub, a by-invitation-only venue, a select few get to enjoy, where the chosen ones are plied with drink and forced to have fun. In Stuart's immortal phrase, "so let's get you lot fucking mashed".
Sin City; Stuart's play room
Before we got too lathered
The night gets messier
It's all Stuart's fault, he hides his horns well
Sin City is the upstairs games room in Stuart's home, replete with pinball machines and video game machines, a juke box, pool table and bar, we did what we were told and went drink-for-drink with the Stuart and Bruce, cut loose, and as everyone in turn fell, staggered, collapsed, danced around and with decreasing competence played pool and with increasing gusto sang along to the music, we got absolutely hammered, totally shitfaced and we all woke up with sore heads, inside and out, bruised temples , sore legs, red-eyed and feeling like a herd of wildebeest were rampaging through our heads, but all the better for it.
This photo and the following photos none of us can remember taking, they were all found on the following day, mementos of what happened after our memories failed us
Blurred, out of focus and underexposed pictures taken by who knows who but the carnage is noticable anyway
We were very well looked after in Esperance and the two day hangover that came after our night in Sin City was symbolic and apt. Stuart and Bruce had also collected supplies for us: food, clothing, beer, soft drinks, jerry cans, and we were overwhelmed by their generosity. From our visit to the Bay Rotary and Rotary clubs, we made more friends and more donations, helping out at the Relay for Life, serving brekkie, and receiving another $250 from Lee McKenna, Rotary President, and later fuel from the rascally lovable rogue Jock 'The Wrecker' Murray before we left.
The Rotary Club meeting
Staying with the Seatons was a lot of fun. With their three energetic children keeping us entertained there was never a dull moment.
Laury riding his horse
It was a truly amazing experience in Esperance, and that word is not here used lightly. From the scheming of Derek, to the generosity of Stuart and Bruce, to the charm of the Seaton's, and the warmth and gregariousness of everyone else, we had been treated to a real community's efforts to welcome us, and help us raise the money. That we had to strip down and smuggle-up to benefit from this overwhelming tide of positivity and munificence was the least we could do. Frostbite yer todger? In a heartbeat.
Rachel, one of the most energetic ladies we have met
Rowan
Sarah
Liam
We start work at 5am to help make 500 breakfasts for Relay for Life participants, well done to all those who participated
Phil with Rotary Club president, Lee
Brian and Paul of Brumbys Esperance donate bread for our Nullarbor trek
Read about us in Esperance local paper here
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